Halloween is the Superbowl for Drinking

I love Happy Endings (and not just the TV show hehe).  I mean for reals y'all, that show is amazeballs.

This past week there was one line in the show that really stood out to me.  I didn't necessarily notice it at the time, but after my Halloween night out came and went (with a couple minor falls, some harmless face to face flirting, and an expensive international texting phone bill) I remembered what was said on Happy Endings "Halloween is the Superbowl for drinking."  My Saturday night proved that statement to be true. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I have been known to get a little crazy from time to time (I have pictures in a blue inner tube while walking around town to prove it), but in general I keep my drinking very controlled.  I get to my happy place and stay there.  I like the happy place.  Three drinks in and I'm louder than normal (shocking), slightly more touchy (again, shocking since I'm super touchy to begin with), and I'm super fun (this is an obvious statement).  Saturday night I was in my happy place.  I can't say the same for the people at the other end of my texting line.....they seemed to be beyond a happy place.  It was awesome.  I heard from a multitude of men whom I have either gone out with once, a couple times, or even had some sort of dating relationship with.  I will not say how I replied to these messages, but I will show you a couple examples.

Man 1:  I bet you look super sexy tonight.  Damn it, the nasty things we could be doing together.  Ugh.

Man 2:  Where do you want me to cum?  (Mind you, I did not use cum in my initial text.....I used come....there is a difference)

Man 3:  Can I borrow your body later?

Man 4:  I wish I had pics of you.  Luckily I have a photographic memory.  You are hot/sexy/and have a great smile.  How are you single?  I don't know.

Yes, this actually happened.  My question is how?  I mean, four different people.....mind you only one of whom I have actually gotten naughty with.  Do I blame it on the a a a a a alcohol?  (I hope everyone rocked out like Jamie Foxx when they read that!)  I woke up Sunday and at some point went through my messages from the night before just to see if I remembered correctly the things I thought I had read.  YUP!  I did.  Getting messages from so many different people who at some point through the night told me how awesome and sexy I am was a great feeling; however, it made me think that it must just be the drinking. 

Now, here is the part where you say "Girl, damn, you have restraint!"  I'm a horny girl.  We all know this.  Being single and horny is SUPER FUCKING HARD because you don't get to benefit from being horny.  I'm basically in my sexual prime and the only people benefiting are the people who make batteries.  I go through Double A's like most people do a gallon of milk.  It's rough, but thank God for vibrators.  Saturday I was propositioned from all over the place and I restrained.  (Pat on the back for me thank you very much).  I'm waiting for one of the four (or even someone new) to prove that he is worthy of my awesome/sexiness.  Until then, I have my B.O.B. (Battery Operated Boyfriend), an unlimited supply of Double A's, and some fun texts about what people would do to me if given the chance.  I have an imagination, I can picture it happening.  I just look forward to the next night where I am everyone's object of affection so I can get some new material to read off my phone.  Until then, I will leave you with this.......

Man 4:  Maybe we can enjoy each other's nakedness? =)